Many of us go through our lives in such a rush that we never stop to look at what’s actually going on. We wake up in the morning, throw down our breakfast and we’re out the door and off to do what we do as fast as you can snap your fingers. We spend our days rushing through our job and waiting to go home. Once we get home we’re rushing around the house trying to get the family fed and doing work around the house, and when it’s finally time to go to bed we’re so tired that we are asleep by the time our heads hit the pillow.

I know this is a huge generalization seeing as how we each live completely different lives, but do you ever feel like you are just running through life and never stopping to smell the flowers? Do you find yourself multi-tasking so much that you hardly even realize that you’re doing or how you’re doing it? Is your life one huge routine that never changes? If any of this applies to you, there’s an easy solution.

The simple solution, my friends, is to slow down. Be mindful. Be aware. This whole world around each and every one of us is a miracle, and it only takes one moment to see this. This goes along well with some of the points I made with my living in the present post. Instead of just rushing through life, stop for a second and take a deep breath. The world isn’t going to run away on you, in fact, it’s going to stop for you and let you behold it’s wonders.

Everything is so beautiful, it’s a fact! All you have to do is look around you. Look at nature’s wonders, listen to the many sounds surrounding you.

You might be surprised to hear that incorporating this into your life is very, very easy. Being completely aware doesn’t have to be hard. Instead of always having your mind in the clouds, try taking it out for a few minutes and just concentrating on what you are doing. For example, try walking to work instead of driving. Focus completely just on the sights and sounds around you, and I bet you will be amazed at some of the things you notice that you never knew about before. Too far away to walk? Try jumping on the subway or the bus. Look around at people, listen to what they are talking about. Even start up a conversation with somebody you don’t know at all! You will see that everyone is different and interesting in their own way if you just break off and be aware.

Everybody can find their own ways to be aware. The fact is, if you can be present in your moment at all times, life will suddenly seem much, much brighter.

Let’s face it: we get angry sometimes. It makes sense, seeing as how anger is a natural human emotion. However, there is a lot to be learned about anger, and when we get a true understanding of this emotion we can learn how to use it to our advantage without losing our heads.

The first thing to do is to look at the cause of your anger:

1) Did you do something that you didn’t like?

2) Did somebody else to do something that you didn’t like?

Of course these are pretty general categories, but they do envelope most of the specific causes of anger. If your anger falls into category number one, there is something we can do about it. Category number 2, however, is a completely different story.

The case with category number 2, simply, is that you can’t control other people. It just can’t be done. Many, many people will try to tell you otherwise but it is a waste of time to even try. You are you, they are them. You can control yourself and the actions that you perform, but you are always going to be a level away from other people. You can become very close with these people and get to know them, but their inner workings (for the most part) will always be a mystery to you, and you can never know exactly how they think and perceive things.

Keeping this in mind, getting angry because of the actions of somebody else really doesn’t make sense. It’s the same case as worrying really; if you can’t control it, why waste time worrying or getting angry about it? We really must realize that there if we can’t control things, we must simply accept this fact and move on with life. And know this: if there are people in your life that are continually wronging you, instead of gettting angry and taking it out on yourself, there is always the option of simply removing these people from your life. We see this in a lot of marriages, where the two people are not getting along at all and stay in the marriage simply because they feel a sense of duty. Of course these situations can be rather complicated, but realize that there are always many options available to you.

Now, getting back to category number one. If you fall into this category, there are many things you can do. You CAN control yourself, as opposed to other people. If you have done something that has made you angry, you do have a choice (and you can do both):

1) Choose not to do it again

2) Observe what happened and use it in a positive, constructive way

 Let’s say, for example, that you are a university student (sorry, easy example for me!). It’s final exam writing time, and you’ve left you’re studying until the last day for some exam. At this point, you find that you are angry at yourself for what you’ve done. Now, instead of flipping out and wasting a bunch of time that you no longer have simply getting angry, doesn’t it seem like a better choice to use this anger and convert it into something constructive? First, see your error and tell yourself that you won’t do it again. Second, use this anger in a postive, constructive manner. Take the time left that you do have and use it efficiently and learn as much as possible before your exam. Salvage what can be salvaged and do the absolute best you can given your current situation.

And finally, LEARN from this situation! If you’ve created this discomfort for yourself in the first place, you can learn that it’s not something you want to do again. However, if this situation ever happens to you again, you know that you can work through it.

Anger in and of itself is really not a bad thing. How anger is perceived is really just based on how you deal with it. If you decide to waste time and lash out, you will see anger as being horrible and negative. If you channel it in positive, useful ways, anger can be a perfectly reasonable emotion. 

Like worrying, living in the present moment is something that seems to be discouraged in society these days. Take careers, for example. Many, many people work jobs that they hate simply because it provides them with their paycheque every 2 weeks and so that they can make contributions to their pension plan. At the same time, people spend all kinds of time thinking about past experiences and how they would change them if they could go back. Don’t get me wrong, planning for the future is not a bad thing to do, but it shouldn’t consume all of your present moments. As for memories, they’re a beautiful thing to have, but wishing we could go back and change them is a waste of time.

Quite simply, the past and the future don’t exist. There is absolutely no way we can go back to a past event and change what happened, no matter how hard we wish it. At the same time, we can’t travel into the future and arrange things a certain way for ourselves. We have to be able to deal with the actions we have performed and we have to accept that the future is, for the most part, a complete mystery. That’s intriguing though, isn’t it?

Once we realize this, we can see that the only time that exists is right now. Life, really, is a series of right now’s; a series of present moments that come and go. Once one present moment is lived, it is gone and we can’t change it. We don’t know what future present moments will hold, either. This is simply because in the past and the future, present moments don’t exist.

So if all we have is right now, this present moment, why would we spend it doing anything that we do not want to do? Why do we continue to wake up everyday and participate in something that is degenerating us? It’s habit, yes. Society for the most part accepts it as a fact of life, yes. The problem with this viewpoint, however, is that doing things simply because we are used to them and comfortable with them is an extremely unhealthy habit in and of itself. The most breathtaking things in life that you can do are things that are new and exciting.

If you find yourself using up your present moment worrying or doing anything else that you don’t enjoy, simply change it. Don’t like your job? Find something else that you do like! Don’t like any other activity that you feel obligated to do? Don’t do it! Find something else! Even though it seems scary, change is not a bad thing at all.

Live in you moment. Enjoy your moment to the fullest extent.

After all, how many moments will we get? 

Worrying is something that almost all of us tend to do. At the same time, it’s something that we all hate doing. This alone leads to a rather obvious question: why do we worry?

Worrying, believe it or not, is really encouraged in our society during childhood. We are, in a way, conditioned to worry because we are told that it is "responsible". By not worrying, we obviously don’t care about what is going on around us, and therefore we should be spending more time doing it if we want to become succesful.

In reality, worrying only has absolutely no positive attributes associated with it. Now, you might point out that worrying leads to thinking and that thinking leads to problem solving. This is not completely wrong. Thinking can lead to problem solving, but it has to be focused, constructive thinking. This kind of thinking is not what worrying evokes. Worrying evokes mindless, repetitive thinking that is absolutely useless and only leads to more and more stress in our minds. This is only just the beginning.

 As we grow up, over time worrying becomes more than just a "solution" to solving a problem. Worrying becomes an obsession and it really leads to much disability. Scientific research has shown that worrying releases poisonous endorphins into the body that can lead to a whole barrage of health problems. Once worrying becomes an obsession, we start to worry about things that really don’t even warrant it whatsoever. We create problems for ourselves that really aren’t important and all, and we worry about them. It can get so bad that once we worry ourselves out of one problem, there is immediately another one knocking at our doors.  

What people need to realize is that worrying is absolutely useless. By getting our mind into this out-of-control state, we are doing nothing to solve any problems. Most of the time we are worrying about things that we can’t control anyways. If we can’t control things, what is the point of worrying about them? Personally, I catch myself doing this all the time. I just recently finished writing midterms (I’m a university student) and after I finished them I found myself worrying about how I did on them. This was during the period where I hadn’t found out my mark yet, and I then realized that I was accomplishing absolutely nothing in doing this. The matter was at this point out of my hands, and all I could do was wait until I got my mark back. If I did well, great! If I didn’t do as well as I expected, I could deal with it in a constructive way. At that point I would have all sorts of options, the most obvious being going and talking to my professor to discuss future strategies for doing better. Basically, instead of sitting doing nothing and worrying about something I can’t control, I must accept that there is nothing I can do during this period and I will act when I actually get my mark back and can do something about it.

The funny thing about all of this is, most of these things we worry about don’t even end up happening at all! Despite any worrying that I subjected myself to, I had prepared well for my midterms and in turn, I did well on them. This holds for most other problems as well. Often times when I catch myself worrying, I’ll tell myself to wait a few days and then think about it again. Sometimes I will even write it down so I can look again later. 99% of the time when I look at these worries that I have written down at a later time, I actually end up laughing because the event that I dreaded didn’t even end up happening. Or if it did, it wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be.

 We all know how hard it is to quit worrying, but it really is fairly simple. Like I mentioned, try writing down anything that you find yourself worrying about and look at it again in a few days. Most of the time you’ll find that you have saved yourself a bunch of time by not worrying, and that your worrying was completely unwarranted. Another strategy is just to simply turn your mind off for a few minutes and not let yourself think about whatever it is you are worrying about. Meditation or even a quick nap are both great strategies to help achieve this.

Worrying is simply a bad habit that becomes an addiction. However, like any addiction, we can overcome this. The longer you go without worrying, the easier it becomes. Eventually, you can become worry free, and at this point I can guarantee you that you will never go back to your old habits. Life becomes a whole new, wonderful place when you can put your worries aside and just simply enjoy yourself.